"I’m afraid you have stage 9 animes."
"Doctor, what’s going to happen to me?"
*Doctor turns away from the patient and speaks in a grim tone.*
"Your desu has advanced too far, you have less than a week to live."
10 HONEST THOUGHTS ON BEING LOVED BY A SKINNY BOY
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says ‘No, you are beautiful.’
I wonder why I cannot be both.
He kisses me
My college theater professor once told me
that despite my talent,
I would never be cast as a romantic lead.
We do plays that involve singing animals
and children with the ability to fly,
but apparently no one
has enough willing suspension of disbelief
to go with anyone loving a fat girl.
I daydream regularly
about fucking my boyfriend vigorously on his front lawn.
On the mornings I do not feel pretty,
while he is still asleep,
I sit on the floor and check the pockets of his skinny jeans for motive,
for a punchline,
for other girls’ phone numbers.
When we hold hands in public,
I wonder if he notices the looks —
like he is handling a parade balloon on a crowded sidewalk;
if he notices that my hands are now made of rope.
Dear Cosmo: Fuck you.
I will not take sex tips from you
on how to please a man you think I do not deserve.
He tells me he loves me with the lights on.
I can cup his hip bone in my hand,
feel his ribs without pressing very hard at all.
He does not believe me when I tell him he is beautiful.
Sometimes I fear the day he does will be the day he leaves.
The cute hipster girl at the coffee shop
assumes we are just friends
and flirts over the counter.
I spend the next two weeks
mentally replacing myself with her
in all of our photographs.
When I admit this to him
we spend the evening taking new photos together.
He will not let me delete a single one of them.
The phrase “Big girls need love too” can die in a fire.
Fucking me does not require an asterisk.
Loving me is not a fetish.
Finding me beautiful is not a novelty.
I am not a fucking novelty.
I say, ‘I am fat.’
He says, ‘No. You are so much more’,
and kisses me
so this is my home state… where people get arrested for being social…
Lol. This was my local where I grew up. Yandina pub always had a few bikies, never seen them cause any kind of fuss.
But hey, you got a bikie kid in your primary school class, parent teacher nights are fucking terrifying.
The only thing that should ever be said regarding carnivores and vegetarianism.
Our rep shop-keeper friend of ours said a vegan brought a snake in for him to take off her and he found a custard cream biscuit in there. She claimed she didn’t want to feed it mice, and was worried that it wasn’t eating so she had tried to force feed it wet custard creams and biscuits.
Fair enough. Be vegan or vegetarian - that’s cool. But don’t get a pet if you’re going to force your diet onto them when they *just can’t live on it*
Not giving an animal what it NEEDS based on YOUR personal life choices is ABUSE plain and simple. You don’t want to feed a snake rodents?
The answer is simple. Don’t get a snake.
As a Vegan I can say that I KNOW my snakes can not be vegan. How anyone can even think otherwise is beyond me. The gif above explains me perfectly right now.